Hey everyone....It's been awhile. Honestly I've been thinking about stopping the show and that's for multiple reasons. Firstly, I'm just busy with other projects. I have a Lets Play channel that I'm super proud of and that's kinda taken this blog's spot as my new passion project. If you want check out the channel Random Nintendo Fun later.
Also my brother Max who use to write for the blog very rarely also has a new passion project. The channel Beta Bit. Of course we're both working on other stuff as well. For example I'm currently working on a new story and choose your own adventure type escapade. Also I just kinda lost some passion for this blog. It just stressed me out sometimes. And now Google + is gone which was this blogs main support in terms of getting attention. But recently I've hit a goldmine of inspiration and I want to come back. I don't know what it was. I guess I just needed a break and a fresh start. Who knows. So much has changed though since we last spoke. I'm now 20 years old. I work fast food now. I also suffer from severe depression. Ok, that was a joke. I've been in a really awful mindset and have been a downward spiral that continues going down each and every day, but I haven't been diagnosed with depression yet. I am having a tough time right now though and sometimes just feel empty. I guess that's a big part of the reason I haven't been working on this blog now that I think about it. Life's just been tough. And honestly I should probably go to a doctor or a therapist....or both. Either way I wanted to say I am back, and I want to start the Animated Critic Universe over again. Yes...for the third time. I'm gonna restart the storyline and update/remake/and add multiple parts and things to the universe. Comic Strikers, The Animated Critic, Tales of Two Heroes. It's gonna be grander and better than ever before. With new additions every Saturday starting....soon ish. Maybe not this Saturday, but sometime by next month. So recap. Every Saturday a new part of the universe will be uploaded. Could be Animated Critic, could be Comic Stikers, Tales of Two Heroes, or the many other shows and stories I have planned.
For now to keep you quenched I have here the last episode of The Animated Critic's past show that I never finished. But there's some good stuff here. This review will probably be remade for the new Universe, so you could consider this a preview as well. Either way enjoy the review of Seikon no Qwasar Episode 1. And remember this is just a rough draft.
Also my brother Max who use to write for the blog very rarely also has a new passion project. The channel Beta Bit. Of course we're both working on other stuff as well. For example I'm currently working on a new story and choose your own adventure type escapade. Also I just kinda lost some passion for this blog. It just stressed me out sometimes. And now Google + is gone which was this blogs main support in terms of getting attention. But recently I've hit a goldmine of inspiration and I want to come back. I don't know what it was. I guess I just needed a break and a fresh start. Who knows. So much has changed though since we last spoke. I'm now 20 years old. I work fast food now. I also suffer from severe depression. Ok, that was a joke. I've been in a really awful mindset and have been a downward spiral that continues going down each and every day, but I haven't been diagnosed with depression yet. I am having a tough time right now though and sometimes just feel empty. I guess that's a big part of the reason I haven't been working on this blog now that I think about it. Life's just been tough. And honestly I should probably go to a doctor or a therapist....or both. Either way I wanted to say I am back, and I want to start the Animated Critic Universe over again. Yes...for the third time. I'm gonna restart the storyline and update/remake/and add multiple parts and things to the universe. Comic Strikers, The Animated Critic, Tales of Two Heroes. It's gonna be grander and better than ever before. With new additions every Saturday starting....soon ish. Maybe not this Saturday, but sometime by next month. So recap. Every Saturday a new part of the universe will be uploaded. Could be Animated Critic, could be Comic Stikers, Tales of Two Heroes, or the many other shows and stories I have planned.
For now to keep you quenched I have here the last episode of The Animated Critic's past show that I never finished. But there's some good stuff here. This review will probably be remade for the new Universe, so you could consider this a preview as well. Either way enjoy the review of Seikon no Qwasar Episode 1. And remember this is just a rough draft.
"Insert Crappy Comment Later"
Show-Seikon no Qwaser
English Title-The Qwaser of Stigmata
Episode Title-The Trembling Night
Air Date-January 10th 2010
Season 1
Episode 1
Hello my name is Evan A.K.A. The Animated Critic.
So....today's show is uh...
A little more NSFW than other things we've covered thus far. So be warned, while I don't necessarily show anything too bad you still might want to be a little careful.
After all this is a show where the main character gets super powers from drinking virgin breast milk.
I swear where do they get these ideas. I'm not even making this up. Chances are though if you already clicked this review you at least know a little about the show just due to it's absurd concept. Some of you, like me, may of even watched it after due to a sick curiosity to see how they could possibly make something with such a ridiculous idea behind it. Most of you were probably expecting it to be at least enjoyably stupid. A so bad it's good type of deal. Well, sorry for your disappointment. If you haven't seen this yet....don't. The ridiculous concept is honestly the best part. Just by hearing that you can probably come up with something more stupidly fun than what they gave us. Those who did watch were indeed greeted with a stupid concept, but also a boring slug fest of an anime. Yes, they take a stupid concept and don't even do anything ridiculously fun with it.
I mean you can take stupid ideas and take them seriously, most superhero film do it pretty well, but those require something special.....talent.
Ok, a little harsh I know.
But you still need good writing behind it. Good characters, and a plot so well done we kinda just forget about how stupid it is that, for example, we're watching people try to save the world by being really good at card games.
You see, even if the writing on Yu-Gi-Oh can get dumb sometimes it's at least always a good time so I can forgive it. That's what the medium is about after all, entertainment.
I assure you none of that can be found her, in this sick twisted world known as....*Dramatic Pause*...
Seikon no Qwaser....or The Qwaser of Stigmata if you prefer
Also known as probably the closest to porn we can get without actually being porn.
We start with a kidnapped girl tied up and surrounded by, uh....
Penis torches?
The kidnapper reveals himself and lights a torch.
Causing a chain reaction, that lights the others, and oh the torches are actual women.
So....nipple torches.
Well....that's just sick.
The fiend begins to exposate to the girl, all the while tearing her clothes off, because anime.
Was that a pee joke?
Get it, cause it looks like she peed.
He then proceeds to kill the girl, splattering blood everywhere.
Even covering up this poor moth.
Don't ask why he decided to tell the girl he was about to kill all that stuff, but I guess he thought it necessary to seem scary. Even though I think the whole kidnapping thing and the torch corpses probably already did the job for ya buddy.
We cut to the city where the episode truly begins.
And in that city we jump to a school, because nothing interesting can come from adult life.
This is a private academy. Which to me is just bonus points for the cliche category.
This is St. Mikhailov Academy, and this particular academy has a campus church.
Inside the church we see our two main characters, praying.
The one with red hair is Mafuyu and the blue haired one is Tomo. They're cousins who have lived together pretty much their entire lives with Tomo's dad.
After Mafuyu ends her prayer she has a flashback of her uncle.
In the flashback he mentions something about an Icon just like Mr. Nipple Torch from earlier.
Yeah that's cool and all, but LOOK HOW CUTE THEY ARE OMG.
Mafuyu describes that one day her uncle disappeared and left a note saying not to worry about him.
"I'm leaving for California to become a famous Televangelist and tell people what to believe."
Mafuyu stands up to get Tomo and tell her it's time to go to school. Only problem, she's sleeping.
Mafuyu wakes her up and we jump cut to BOOBS!
Ugh, you know I never thought I'd be so tired of seeing boobs until I started watching anime and having about 9 out of 10 shows consisting of regular fanservice.
On the walk to school Mafuyu does some of the most thinly veiled exposition I've ever seen.
It's not that bad now, but the exposition gets super clunky later on.
Tomo thanks Mafuyu for helping her out and then proceeds to trip.
Wait, tripping?
Oh no. This means.....
GOD DA** IT.
The girl she tripped over is named Teresa who literally just picks up a Tulip and says....
Wow, I didn't know we were watching Sesame Street. Hold on I wanna play.
Circle
Red
Trash
....Is this a trick question?
I see no difference between this and the last?
Mafuyu talks to Teresa.
What do you mean "too"? In no scene is it implied at all that you weren't in school because of work. In fact you even say in a later scene that Tomo wasn't at school because she was sickly.
I'm gonna leave it to bad subbing.
After Teresa leaves Tomo and Mafuyu describe Teresa's personality to us...You know, instead of just letting us experience it for our selves.
What? What does that have to do with anything? If that's supposed to be a secret that's a pretty terribly hidden secret.
Yes, having the luck of having incredible genes is such a talent. Congrats, you put so much effort into your craft.
After snarkily insulting Tomo, Mafuyu decides to show some kindness.
When the two get to class they see some flowers that they left on a desk are dead, and based on the dialogue we can assume it's a thing that happens frequently.
Mafuyu begins to blame the people in the class, and not the fact that they haven't been there in three days to water the dang thing.
Eventually a student speaks up, making snarky comments about Tomo's absence.
Though to be fair she makes a good point.
Exactly....Unless the flowers were ripped up (which they weren't) I don't think anyone in class is to blame you stuck up brat.
Mafuyu steps up by saying Tomo's body is weak and that's why she missed so much school.
The bully decides to give some exposition, while showing off her obvious foreshadowing necklace.
Despite the fact that she's not even saying anything especially rude she's treated as the bad guy. I mean her tone is snarky and stuck up, but all she's doing is giving exposition. She hasn't even said anything bad yet and yet we're just supposed to hate her, becuase....anime.
A seemingly quiet and shy girl tries to stand up for Mafuyu.
And cue more thinly veiled exposition.
Miss Class President sits back down.
Then she finally says something that can make me understand why Mafuyu is acting like such a jerk to her.
The former headmaster being Tomo's father, Mafuyu's uncle.
Mafuyu finally has an emotion I can understand.
She pushes up the "bully" against a wall and tells her even though she's the daughter of the current headmaster doesn't mean she can run her mouth off like that.
Tomo tries to break the fight up and this causes a screenshot that looks straight out of a hentai.
This anime might as well be a hentai though. The only thing that keeps it from getting that rating is that nothing below the belt is shown. But once we get past the usual anime fanservice cliches and get into the most memorable part of this show, you'll see what I mean.
Another girl stands up names Tsujidou. She's rocking anime cliche #169141181918
Pink Hair
She begins giving this monologue in the most posh way possible.
I just realized she looks like Giffany from Gravity Falls.
As you can also see Giffany here is rather robust meaning she has the obvious status as one of the main characters.
Now here's a character that a the hate target actually makes sense for. The things she's saying and the way she says them makes them sound like a threat.
She backs down though when Mafuyu gets angry.
Tomo steps in and tells Mafuyu to calm down.
"Though now that I think about it father smiled all the time and he's currently missing so....maybe take that with a grain of salt."
We cut to the campus where we see two people having a conversation.
The two having the conversation is a priest and a nun wearing the tightest gown I've ever seen on a religious figure.
The priest says "they" have found them. "They" being an unknown entity for right now.
We also get a look at the nun's face and see it's Teresa.
Cue more awful exposition.
"Yeah thanks for reminding me about that douche rag."
We cut to Mafuyu and Tomo complaining about the bully....well mostly Mafuyu, who says Miyuri use to be really cute.
Mafuyu decides to perk up and says she'll make a feast to celebrate Tomo's return to school.
Tomo reacts by losing her eyes.
Oop, time for another hentai screen shot.
"Tomo likes to speak about Tomo in the third person. It's Tomo's favorite past time."
While Tomo runs on ahead Mafuyu starts thinking.
It's because you're not smiling enough.
See, stop taking things so seriously. Just chillllll.......
As Tomo runs ahead she, oh my God, trips again.
F**K!!!
She falls on top of a person. Who....uh....
Begins to play with her breast......
Because anime.
Mafuyu takes notice of the gender ambiguous human.
Oh my god.
It't the human reincarnation of The Blue Eyes White Dragon.
Mafuyu says it looks like the painting on the church wall.
The person says something...
and then proceeds to try and suck Tomo's tits.
Again, this might as well be a hentai.
Mafuyu knocks him out with a bamboo stick, causing him to have to be in the care of the two while he/she sleeps.
Tomo takes pity of her harasser and scolds Mafuyu for hitting him/her so hard.
To be fair this anime does have one really funny scene
It seems that I'm not the only one who can't tell this dude/dudette's gender as the two begin fighting about it. Tomo thinks he's a girl, but Mafuyu says she's a boy. They decide to invade his/her privacy by checking themselves if you know what I mean. Instead of taking the non-illegal route and waiting for him/her to wake up so they could ask.
Either way though they don't get their answer as the man/the woman left while they were arguing.
So Mafuyu has to go out and find the mysterious person.
Uh....Mafuyu.
She does turn around to notice the church burning, but only seems concerned with the measly painting inside it.
So she runs in there, panties flying.
